An Interview with Joey
If you’ve read any of our blog, you probably know that we evolved into this lifestyle, somewhat organically. If you aren’t familiar with us, I’d recommend reading the content on our homepage and also check out our “About Us” page, which gives a better background on us and what we do.
So…I’ve been asked a variety of questions around the topic of getting domestic discipline spankings and so thought I’d respond to them all here.
Question: Since It’s “Consensual”, Do The Spankings Really Hurt?
Answer: HELL YES they hurt! I can understand how the term “consensual” might lead one to believe that I consent only up to the point where it really starts becoming painful, then I can opt out citing I no longer consent to the spanking/pain. But what I’ve consented to (and continue to consent to), are real consequences by way of real domestic discipline spankings from my wife. The fact that I take what is given, is consenting on my part because I’m never tied or restrained in any way. So I COULD stand up and stop it at any time and say, “I don’t want to take this anymore”. But the moment I do that, then it isn’t a real spanking, is it?
I must also understand that by doing so, I would be relinquishing the real domestic discipline element/lifestyle that we have developed and that has worked so well for us. There are some that take punishment spankings up to a point, then safeword out. I’m not opposed to that if that is what works for you. What ~I~ set out to do was to be truly accountable and take what SHE assigns and gives. Keep in mind, while the spankings are very real, very harsh, and very painful, there has never been a time where it has been abusive or sadistic. This woman loves me. We are soulmates and were soulmates before we ever started down this road. We are lovers and best friends, and she knows me better than anyone else in the world. Lastly, because we’ve been doing this for a while, she knows my limits. She knows how far to take things and I trust her implicitly.
Question: When You Know She’s Going To Spank You, Do You Get Nervous Or Aroused?
Answer: Nervous for sure. Sometimes I may have a little bravado about the impending spanking, but the closer we get to the actual event, the more nervous I get. This is because I know that I’m in for a REAL DD spanking and what that feels like. When we were doing fun or sexual spankings, or spankings where I knew I could safeword out, I found those to be arousing. But that was because I was in control of stopping the pain as soon as it got to be too much for me. Now, I don’t give myself that option and just take what is given. So bending over the end of the bed (usual position for our domestic discipline spankings), bare butt, as she stands to the side with a harsh implement is a very daunting thing. And, unlike “fun” spankings, there are no light swats or warm up swats to start. From the moment the very first swat or lash lands, the pain is overwhelmingly present and continues to grow throughout the duration of the spanking.
Question: Have These Real Spankings Ever Made You Cry?
Answer: Yes. Part of that I believe is me letting go a little bit but other times I wonder. The implement “The Wicked Switch“, is the most painful thing I’ve ever felt in my entire life. It lands with a searing pain that exceeds even a water soaked cane. I don’t think I could NOT cry even if I wanted to when that implement is being used. Thankfully, she uses it sparingly. Oftentimes when getting the belt or paddle or punishment strap, painful grunts escape my lips during those spankings and tears will well up in my eyes. And sometimes, if it is particularly a harsh session, I will break down and cry.
Question: What Are You Thinking During A Harsh Spanking?
Answer: That’s a really great question. Once that first lash or swats lands and the searing pain enters my body, I don’t know if there is a lot of thought going on, other than trying to maintain position as per the “Spanking Rules“. The pain is coming too quickly and as it continues to accumulate I’m not thinking about much else. When she’s using the belt, a punishment strap or cane, she’ll give one half of the spanking from one side, and the other half of the spanking from the other side. As a result, the end of the belt, strap or cane, will do a number on both sides of my butt. When she stops from the first side, I often have a thought of relief as I know I’m about halfway through. After she finishes from the second side, she’ll usually assign a final count. I’m relieved again as I know I just need to get through the final 10 or 20 swats, then the punishment will be over. Many times I’ve planned on counting the swats of the entire spanking (in my head), just to see how many I’m getting. But, again…once that first swats lands…the brain goes into…self preservation, ‘Oww this hurts, maintain position, oww this hurts’ mode. It’s quite the mental rollercoaster.
Question: How Long Will You Behave After A Spanking?
Answer: I’m usually well behaved for several weeks to a month after a good domestic discipline session. There are three kinds of spankings she normally gives: Impromptu swats for spur of the moment infractions (usually just a handful of swats), Attitude adjustments (these are more dedicated spankings where I’ve earned swats for doing or not doing something but haven’t quite earned a trip to the woodshed), and then of course “Woodshed Whuppin’s” (these are the worst of the worst and happen about every 1 and a half to 2 months).
Question: Do You Ever Resent Her For Giving You A Harsh Spanking?
Answer: Never. Firstly, I know I can be a handful. I also know I have aggressive personality traits. So when she has deemed it necessary to give me a spanking, I know that I’ve earned it, deserve it, and quite honestly need it.
Question: Do You Get To Choose What You Get Spanked With?
Answer: Not usually. Every once in a great while, she’ll tell me to go get her a belt without being specific (and I assure you I don’t pick the Italian leather one). That said, she still succeeds in giving me a severe butt whuppin’ with whatever belt I bring her. One time I actually kept being a brat because I noticed the belt she was wearing was a not so “mean” belt, (or so I thought). She took it off, doubled it over and gave me a belting for the books! She compensated for the belt’s spanking shortcomings by swinging it so that she caught me with its edge with almost every swat. I learned right then and there, that just about ANY belt in her hands can give an effective and painful spanking.
Question: What Implement Would You Prefer To Be Spanked With?
Answer: She has a wide black leather belt, that would be my implement of choice. Don’t get me wrong, it still hurts pretty bad and can blister and bruise my backside, but…it is not as severe as a couple of her other leather belts. Especially the Italian leather one. All she has to do is just WEAR that belt and I my initial reaction is to behave.
Question: What Implement Do You NEVER Want To Be Spanked With?
Answer: Easy to answer. The Wicked Switch. I absolutely despise and loathe that thing. The pain from the lash of that is the worst pain I’ve experienced in my entire life. When she does get it out to spank me with it. I almost instantly feel like crying. For the most part, I will acquiesce to whatever implement she is going to spank me with and remorsefully bend over for the whuppin’. But with this implement, I will often BEG her to spank me with something else. She normally doesn’t change her mind once she’s chosen it. And on a couple of occasions, begging for something different cost me extra lashes with it AFTER the initial spanking was over.
Question: Do You Ever Regret Getting Into This Lifestyle?
Answer: Not at all. Again, this is consensual. I could tell her I don’t want to do it anymore but I have come to understand and appreciate its value…to me, to her, and to our relationship. There is so much trust and communication that is necessary when doing this kind of thing, that it has actually taken our love, trust, and intimacy to new levels. My wife wrote a great post about the benefits of having a spanking relationship with your husband, that highlights some great points regarding its ability to help eliminate tension between a couple.
Well, that’s it for now. If you have any additional questions for me (or my Queen) feel free to ask them here and we’ll do our best to answer them quickly. Until then, take care!